Cured

One of the miracles of 21st century technology is that a certain group of people are no longer vulnerable to the common cold, or flu viruses, or the ever-popular "allergies". These people, my friends, are the "cigarette smokers". Yes, never again will they fall victim to one of these annoying illnesses. No, they will be coughing and sneezing "because they smoke", instead, and they will be told so, repeatedly by their friends and co-workers - the same ones, incidentally, who are recently recovered from colds, flus, viruses, etc. and who have spent the last week and a half spraying their diseased coughs and sneezes all over the office.

But the smoker is safe from all these germs and instead starts having a "smoker's cough", which, strangely enough, goes away after a week or two , same as everyone else's did , who had colds. (and these people did a lot of whining and complaining, by the way).

No fear - everyone else will be cured in the near future too - when "global warming" will cause all illnesses including cold viruses, and the common cold will be eradicated. But a cigarette smoker will be safe from "global warming" too, and will still have symptoms caused only by smoking.

There you have it.

Cured.