I'm Getting It Together - oh, wait...

Tonight I started clearing out one of the flower beds with tall weeds that has been like that since Bob went to the hospital in 2004; because then it couldn't be done and after that it was too overwhelming. What I did was take cutters and cut down the tall stuff and then use raking and digging rake-dig type implements (wth are they called) and drag out debris. The plan was to then hack and dig out the short remaining stuff with other unknown unnamed implements (I have gadgets! oh boy) and then start digging.

Well.

The ground seems to have turned into concrete, there, in that place. A tree has actually grown there! and then died, so now I suppose it has to be dug out too; dug out of cemented dirt. Maybe a saw... But anyway, my hacking-digging has little effect except to Really Make Me Mad.

Some plants have survived, especially the Lilies of the Valley - mmm I love them - so I don't want to just take a roto-tiller in there (thanks, Gary!) so I think I will wait for a good rain to soften it all up and then go out and hack and dig with unnamed tools. and gum boots.

I ended up sitting on the deck and admiring it from afar. From there you can't tell anything's wrong with it.

Like the plant in my trunk.

Dead Plant

I have one in the trunk of my car. I brought it home from work so no one would find out.

When I came back to work after being in the hospital there was a lovely flowering plant sitting on my desk that the boss's wife had left there for me. What a nice thing! Unfortunately it turned out to be a very high maintenance plant; every day it would start drooping, then I would water it again, then it would perk up.

I watered it Friday! (I think I did I know I did I think I know I did...) But today, Monday, it was deader than a doornail. Dead dead dead. Water did not help.

So I had to get it out of there before the boss's wife came in. I told the boss to tell her I took it home; and that was not a lie.

and now I don't want to look at it. It can stay in my trunk a little while.

This is why I have anxiety.

Election Year

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Whirled Peas

I am up late tonight, trying to figure out a plan for world peace but it baffles me; human nature being what it is.

So I guess I'll just go to bed, with nothing done about it. sorry.

But I think we could begin with these people at the grocery store! The aisle blockers and EWNA's and AWNA's. Controlling them would contribute greatly to MY whirled peas.

FYI - I have named all the fish in the pond, "Bob".

Except one. that one is named "Steve". So I can tell them apart, dontcha know.

Peace out.

Update On Bob (the Sheep)

comment from Vicky:
"Bob is the mommy. A proud and diligent mother is Bob."

well, now, Vicky. You will have to improve your observational skills when picking sheep.

that aside, I am really enjoying the fact that you have a mama sheep named "Bob"

ROFLMAO
...wipes tears from eyes...

OK - let's name more stuff, "Bob", ok?
I'm in I have experience.

4

Kyle is 4 now (Ryan is almost 2, and he calls Kyle, "Kole", near as I can make it out.) Kyle likes to run around anything circular; say, the furniture on the deck - which is not at all circular - but you CAN make a run around all of it. Ryan follows along behind Kyle, dragging his blue blanket and saying, "Kole! Kole! Why? Why?" I'm not kidding - his new word is "why". This seems all somewhat surreal to me, but it can go on for an hour or more. Kyle will eventually tell Ryan not to ask him "why" anymore, but it doesn't work.

I'm never sure if we should intervene.

I took Kyle for a walk down the neighboring road while Ryan took his nap - we took the wagon and picked up interesting rocks (mostly chunks of asphalt - for Mommy) along the way, or Kyle got in the wagon and I pulled him. At one point he got obsessed with trying to throw small rocks down a storm drain and I had to say, "Kyle! Let's continue on!" so he got in the wagon again - and down the road apiece I got involved with looking at some interesting wild flowers - and finally Kyle said, "Gramma! Let's continue on!"

heh.

I have to admit, it's been quite a while since I examined the ground this closely while walking; or scuffed my toes in the dirt. (And it's still fun!) I told him I would teach him how to skip next time - what do you think? Is that a "girly" thing? Not to mention I might hurt myself. Oh, forget "might". It's a given. Maybe I should teach him how to give CPR....

Tired OUT

Tropical Hibiscus. I have it in a pot. It must be taken in, in the winter, where I will kill it over a period of several months. slowly, so that I can savor the process.

We are on our second out of three straight weekends of babysitting - this one's done. Now how do such small characters get so much energy, you may ask. You may well ask. There is no answer to that question.

and the other question is: how did we ever successfully raise, in the case of myself, FIVE of these creatures. When did I eat? When did I sleep? When did I go to the bathroom? I can't comprehend the fact that I did it, and survived. ah well - I was a stay-at-home mom. question is: How do the girls do it, and work full time?

Or maybe that's how you survive it, beats me. I can't realize the fact that I ever did it; or went for five straight years without being able to sleep in on a weekend.

Could it be a figment of my imagination?

Kyle

His birthday party was for kids, at Geauga Lake water thing and Grm & Grp's role was to babysit the two youngest ones while it was happening. No lake thing for us, nosiree - anyway.

He showed up with cotton in his ear from an ear infection and ended up with a black eye and multiple bruises; from having crashed into another kid at the Lake. (He may be an undercover Bungle, like his mother for all I know)

I hope his next birthday is better.

Vicky's Bob is Fruitful and Multiplies

?

Is Bob the Mommy or the Daddy?

?

Grills

I had a list of things in the checkout cart at Sears parts (online) to refurbish our grill. It came to $40, but we also should get a new burner ($50) because the old one is rotting out in places which seem dangerous to me.

Wal Mart has brand dang new ones for anywhere from $98 to $268.

hmmm whattodo

Grandma Duty

Tonight we are babysitting overnight for Alex and Baby Drew, then driving them to Kyle's birthday party tomorrow - which is at Julie's.

I'm looking forward to spending some more time with Drew, who has been bursting into tears whenever I talk to him. Tonight we shall overcome this and become friends!

I am a little upset that I can't spend enough time with grandchildren, due to the accursed "job" -

(wait, I have to go check the lottery results -)

Water

Last week we had some pretty strong storms during which the garden hose, which was on a reel, popped off and water was running unabated into the yard. (you should always keep it turned off, it seems)

No big deal.

It would have been better to know this, though, BEFORE Bob tore the whole pump apart and replaced parts, looking for the source of the low water pressure in the house. Our water hasn't worked right, since.

Just saying.

Hope You Had A Nice Weekend

... but now, that's over. Next long weekend will be Labor Day - and it's pretty far away. oh me.
We are doing a lot of babysitting next weekend, so we have to get in shape.

We were sitting on the deck tonight and Bob said, "the days are getting shorter now". so I made him stop talking ; I don't want to think about that. I found some pics on my phone of the deck in February with 3 feet of snow on it - it makes me appreciate the 80-90 degrees we get now. There's 9 months of winter or almost winter or almost done winter and only 3 months of summer, and that gets screwed up with rain and construction. Should be the other way round.

You would think.

Danger Danger

I downloaded the newest update to Firefox and ended up with nothing - nothing would work. So I had to go to the website and dl the whole thing over again. Just saying.

Oh - P.S.

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!

Picnic

I am sorry for anyone who turns up today, expecting a picnic - because after many reversals we are having it tomorrow instead.

If you come today you will be lucky to get a hot dog - or maybe a piece of cheese; and I have some excess celery; and you should thank God for it, too.

But I probably will say "aaack!" and slam the door shut.

that's just the way I am.

The Story

I forgot about you, Faithful Readers -
This is the email I sent to The Children™, explaining my side of the story during my hospital stay - so I could save them from having to berate me (5 times over). Best to get it over with all at once.
So here it is, make of it what you will:

I am writing this mostly for Lisa, who called all unknowing while I was in the thick of my crankyiness.and who wants to know all the details.ok - here's what happened. I know I talked to all of you while in the hospital but most of the time I was really cranky. I really am sorry that this turned into such a big upset.Saturday night I went into an elevated heart rate for a longer period of time than usual. This happened to me once before, at work, where I was sure I had had a heart attack and thus I sent Liz an email telling her where to find all my passwords for online banking, etc. without an explanation, I might add, but we all know I'm a worrier.When I first got uncomfortable at 7:00 pm I checked my heart rate with Bob's cuff and it was 106. (I think normal is 80 to 90?) Then I periodically checked over the next four hours during which it climbed to 119 (last time Bob was in vfib at 150) and then slowly started going back down, - there was chest and arm discomfort through the whole thing. Bob was wanting to call an ambulance all the while but I would not let him - I knew it went away before and I thought it would go away again. At 10 he said he was going to bed - it was down to 103 then. I waited a little longer, then went to bed too, but I was all uncomfortable, my chest was all achy and I could not lay right. Nevertheless I dozed off periodically, until about 3 am when I started having severe pains in the middle of my chest that would come and go but were severe and doubled me over. Then I checked with the cuff again and my bp and hr were normal - at least, my hr was 74 and that bothered me a little, because usually it's in the 90's. At 4:30 I told Bob maybe he should get up and so we went off to the hospital after I convinced him he could just drive me. And I convinced him not to call any of you all. By this time I had convinced myself that I had also contracted bronchitis and this is why the chest pains because I had the same thing once before - went to bed fine and woke up in the night, blah blah. Anyway - we went to Geauga hospital where they did blood work and said I had had a heart attack. THAT is when I let Bob call anyone. (and I also said the "act of contrition" - but that's beside the point; I get scared, too, sometimes). At this point, everyone got called, and I am sorry about that. I had a chest xray at Geauga where they ruled out bronchitis, but I was not completely convinced. Good news! I had good chest xrays, (2) smoker that I am.By this time, Julie came - she was on her way home from work and swung by and the decision was made that I should go to the Clinic instead of being admitted to Geauga (thank God, and Julie, by the way - well, maybe). (Except for the part about taking my purse and stuff away from me.) But we all agree that Geauga would have had me in unnecessary surgery by now.an ambulance took me to the clinic since no one would agree to let me drive myself or have Bob do it, it makes me tired, but it took me to the ICU where they stuck me up some more, did another chest xray (obsessed with smoking) and a doctor did an echo and told me I did NOT have a heart attack - yay, it was bronchitis, I knew it - well, no - but nevertheless, would not let me go home until more blood and stuff was done, hopefully, by the next day (Monday) I could go home. Well, today, is Tuesday and I got home today around 4:00. Because by then, I was in their clutches.
Now it's Sunday night, I am in the clinic CICU, I have had nothing to eat or drink all day, So I begged for, and got, some food and COFFEE around 8:00PM. Believe it or not, no smoking did not bother me, nothing bothered me, except lack of my morning coffee - 13 hours later. I was under the assumption that after they sent me to a "step down" unit (when they found room) - I could go home, the next day. And by 9:00 they actually sent me to a room, nothing short of miraculous, I have had experience with this, with Bob.So I happily went to sleep in my new room, with my new, very nice, roommate. (Poor thing.) To wake in the morning wanting my COFFEE and to be told I do not GET breakfast, or ANYTHING to eat or drink for that matter, because I am scheduled for a STRESS TEST at noon. I can't go home, either, until we get the results from that thing. Now, this stress test had been suggested to me the day before as something I should do after I was released.What the hell.Bob was expecting to come and take me home so I called him and told him to wait until I call him, when I'm done with the ding dang stress test. Which the nurse, whose name is either Monica or Emonica, assures me I can do when the results are in; go home, that is. She wrote "Emonica" on the board, but I didn't believe it, so I kept calling her Monica. My roommate told me later that's her name, Emonica.I should mention at this point that I have been attached to a cardiac monitor this whole time; and for some reason, none of the leads will stay stuck to my body for longer than 30 minutes; I think 6 of them, along with all the bandaids from drawing blood and the tape at IV sites (2), so I have nurses in the room constantly reattaching leads although they care not about IV sites which to me, are very important (Bob!); anyway so I constantly have dangling leads and alarms going off and flapping tape on both arms and I know all the nurses hate me, why wouldn't they. I would. Especially Emonica, who I call by the wrong name.(side note: why will nothing stick to me? should I be concerned?) plus I also kept bringing up the fact that I CUT MY TOE ON CAT FOOD FRIDAY (check my blog) - maybe that's the cause of all this? and then I got the blank stares, of course. My roommate is in a state of wonderment.Oh my God I truly am insane now.Well I started out this email trying to reassure yall and it has turned into a farce I think. I can't even take my own (non) heart attack seriously, it seems. Now then.
"Transport", as they call them, came to take me to the stress test at noon, in a wheelchair (me, in a wheelchair, not them). Fine. I can walk, but fine. "Transport" are actually human beings, who wheel you as fast as they can down a maze. I think they're on piecework; thus the speed.They parked me in a waiting room with a person behind the desk who was watching Judge Judy - I became engrossed in it, myself. an hour passed, with people coming in, being called out, coming back in, waiting a few minutes, called out again, and finally leaving.After an hour, someone came and got me! Happy! they took me in a room and injected radioactive stuff in my flapping iv (oooh - cancer?)- wheeled me back out and said it has to sit for 30 minutes. back to Judge Judy, who changed to Judge somebody else.Anyhoo after 45 minutes I am taken away to lay under a device of some sort where I dozed off so I don't know what happened; sorry. whisked away again after being told the scan was "no good", have to wait another 30 minutes, re-scan. A new judge is on in the waiting room. My goodness, people have a lot of silly problems, don't they?Another 40 minutes: re-scan; fell asleep again, but it was "good". Back to the judge. I decide I don't like this judge.30 minutes - take me away, inject more cancer, walk on treadmill. FUN! Back to the room, the judge is gone and there's a soap opera on and I am getting emotional. BACK TO THE ROOM with the machine where I sleep, and do that again. Back to the tv room, where no one is left at all, and the person behind the desk is putting on her hat and coat and says, "my goodness. Are you still here?" She leaves. It's 4:00. "Transport" has been called and is coming, but there is now nothing on tv that I care to watch. So after an hour I just get up and take an elevator that's handy nearby and try to find my room, which I don't do right away, having gone into G90 instead of G91 and there is now a man in the other half of my room.I am now big time cranky. It's 5:00. I'm flapping leads and tape and holding my gown shut behind. I can't find my room (I think I saw "transport" getting on as I was getting off the elevator - sucks to be them). And I still have not had coffee.this HAS turned into a story, hasn't it?

Bob has been trying to catch me while I'm frantically looking for my room - I finally see him and figure he is near the room I belong in. whew. but I'm cranky. I send him down to the cafeteria for coffee and food. the only important things, as I no longer care about going home - I just want coffee. We will sort the rest out later. As soon as he leaves, a person with a clip board enters the room and says they are from admitting and, can I fill out some forms. "We have you down as self-pay..." OMG! I kill myself every month paying for my health insurance and it didn't get transferred from Geauga. There is absolutely no one in completely two whole hospitals that can do anything right, at all. Bob is leaving in an elevator to get coffee and he has MY STUFF. should have kept my purse, never again...So I run out to the desk and ask them to page him to return. No one knows how. They figure out, finally, but they page Bob Rayl's Family to return to G91 in a soft voice he will never hear, so I just got on the elevator again and went to the cafeteria to find him - flappings, gown, and all. Found him just paying at Subway so I just took the food, told him to go to the room and give stuff to admitting and then loaded up the food tray with more stuff, seeing as how I was already there, paid, elevatored, got a little lost, but wended my way back to find the whole room FULL of irate people - nurses, transports, Bobs, admittings. Evidently I have been missing, and that's not allowed. loose patients are dangerous. (I can see why, they might tell) dang me. they oughtta take a rope and hang me. God knows how much they torture you there if you actually DO have a heart attack. No wonder there's a code blue every hour.My roommate is in awe. We are friends!If you want to know the rest you can go to my blog (Note: the part about being evacuated)

so technology having failed me I just did some googling and other stuff and I think my whole problem is "anxiety", if you want to know; as I have recently returned to having "night terrors" which I think is hereditary, seeing as how Glenn, Troy, and Kyle? had them too; but it's interesting having them as a grown up. Not to say that it's not dangerous, if it leads to elevated heart rhythms I suppose it can actually kill you but don't worry about it for now.If it happens again we are going to the hospital while it's ongoing - they can't tell anything when it's over.Liz says there is medication for anxiety. Not sure I want medication but I'll look into it. OK I am sure I don't want medication. but I will still look into it.

Clinic Pod People

I was thinking.
what if all the blood taking and what not was to see if I was a viable candidate for "transformation", but since mine was contaminated with cat food they finally released me. Otherwise I could have been "transformed" and given a new name, maybe something like "Esara".

Don't call the white frocked people! Just funning wit ya.

4th of July

We may, or may not, be having a picnic -which may, or may not, be on Friday or Saturday.

Heh. Just kidding.

Friday at 3-ish.